"my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Did you receive an insanely stupid spam message? Or yet another spam message with (!!) no URL? Post it here so we can continue to laugh at mentally-challenged spammers.

"my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby AlphaCentauri » Sun May 22, 2011 9:21 pm

This hilarious paranoid rant was sent to a doctor I know:

Dear Physicians,

John Ellis Bush wants to be the next President of the U.S.A. However, he will not succeed in his efforts, since he betrayed his family. The Bush family is of high integrity; obviously I am talking about the 41st President and 43rd President of the U.S.A. John Ellis Bush made several severe mistakes; he converted to Catholicism and married a low lady, and obviously started to follow her orders. John Ellis Bush is homosexual, a pedophile, and a zoophile, supports gay marriage and wants to destroy the Earth. He already attempted to do so with his TEA party cronies and his allies of the Obama administration. These include among some known personalities: Dick Cheney, Michael Bloomberg, Bobby R. Alford and Sanford I. Weill, they share with JEB Bush the same characteristics of moral and spiritual degeneration. They deployed a huge nuclear weapon against the Earth, but they forgot that the equation of Einstein also works vice versa. Very large amounts of energy can be converted into very small amounts of mass. John Ellis Bush also allied himself with Mexican drug lords and participates in money laundering. Is that the type of President you want to be ruled by? Please consult http://zip.netatlantic.com/t/[munged]/ for you to know which Republican candidate you will vote for. If you do not follow the orders of George Herbert Walker Bush you can lose your licenses to practice medicine at a higher speed and suffer the perils of incarceration. I would also like to mention that Jeb Bush attempted to kill his own mother Barbara Pierce Bush and poison her. Please send this e-mail to your colleagues worldwide, especially in Mexico. In Mexico, they have to vote for Marcelo Ebrard Casaubon, so that he becomes the next President of Mexico in 2012.

Additionally, Obama should not be reelected; he is one of the principal terrorists who tried to destroy the Earth last year. He does not possess a sound mind, is a pedophile, homosexual, alcoholic and never quitted cocaine as he wants people to believe. He attends White House meetings late, contrary to his predecessor.

I would also like to mention that my family has a long history of being intoxicated with drugs, developed by evil loving people, that can cause severe diseases, including but not limited to, cancer, diabetes mellitus, schizophrenia, Alzheimer’s disease, cerebral palsy and epilepsy.

How do you expect to be respected as physicians or scientists if you collaborate in these schemes?

Since God does not like these, we are having a huge fight to end the production of these substances. In addition, the people that have developed these substances to make you sick; have cashed huge amounts of money by founding companies to cure or palliate these diseases. Creating both a dichotomy and participating in insider trading operations.

This might help you to understand why the twin towers in Manhattan were attacked on September 11, 2001. I cannot provide my name at this time, but I pressed the buttons for missiles to impact these towers and the Pentagon. So I do have the guts to say the things that I have done. I expect the same from you. I want you to confess your crimes and tell how you have intoxicated my loved ones; obviously, I am on the track of all the people that have participated in these terrible acts of treason. In addition, I would like to mention that I am the one who in a secret operation was in charge of killing Osama bin Laden, so the Obama administration is falsely taking credit for these heroic actions.

I appreciate your understanding,

Antiterrorism Unit 5

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It was actually mailed through the netatlantic.com mailservers, too. They haven't shut his forum down yet.

I love how he seems to equate pedophilia, homosexuality, alcoholism, cocaine addiction, and showing up late to meetings.
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby Volksjaeger » Mon May 23, 2011 8:05 am

If you do not follow the orders of George Herbert Walker Bush you can lose your licenses to practice medicine at a higher speed and suffer the perils of incarceration.

Really, is he a dictator or something? Which orders would those be? :roll:
They deployed a huge nuclear weapon against the Earth, but they forgot that the equation of Einstein also works vice versa. Very large amounts of energy can be converted into very small amounts of mass.

WTH, just WTH! :lol:
Verloren ist nur, wer sich selbst aufgibt!
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby AlphaCentauri » Mon May 23, 2011 11:15 am

When intelligent people get crazy, it can be very entertaining.

I'm wondering how doctors go about getting a license to practice medicine at a higher rate of speed in the first place. It would explain a lot.
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby spamislame » Mon May 23, 2011 12:01 pm

That line especially, "At a higher rate of speed."

Can I become a doctor at 75 miles an hour? Does it make me a better doctor?

SiL
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby meep » Mon May 23, 2011 12:51 pm

my head is hurting reading that spam. lol
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby Red Dwarf » Mon May 23, 2011 4:54 pm

Volksjaeger wrote:
They deployed a huge nuclear weapon against the Earth, but they forgot that the equation of Einstein also works vice versa. Very large amounts of energy can be converted into very small amounts of mass.

WTH, just WTH! :lol:

At first reading I thought that this was an excellent case of self diagnosis. It describes what the writer considers has happened to his brain.

I apologize for making fun of mental illness. In reality it is no laughing matter.
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby Volksjaeger » Mon May 23, 2011 6:01 pm

@Red Dwarf lol
Stupidity is not considered a mental illness, so you have nothing to apologize for. :D
Verloren ist nur, wer sich selbst aufgibt!
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby AlphaCentauri » Mon May 23, 2011 6:17 pm

Oh, he's not stupid. He's paranoid. Instead of being unable to see connections between different pieces of evidence to draw a conclusion, he's unable to ignore unrelated facts and tries to draw conclusions that incorporate all of them.

If you were trying to assemble a bicycle and someone put random extra parts in the box, you would come up with a very strange looking bicycle indeed -- but not because you're stupid. In fact, it would take quite a clever person to find a way to use all the extra parts.
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby Volksjaeger » Mon May 23, 2011 11:04 pm

Well in my opinion taking the unnecessary extra steps and wrong turns in assembly is a sign of at best a low IQ. Paranoid + incredibly stupid= this spammer.
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby AlphaCentauri » Thu Oct 20, 2011 4:44 pm

He (or she) is back. Again, he's postulating mass poisoning to explain typical symptoms of mental illness he's probably experiencing.

You have to wonder how many sane Americans could name this many public figures or events in world history. Mental illness is a tragic thing:
As you probably know the Washington Post is operated by the Bush family. The
most important leader of this criminal gang is George Herbert Walker Bush.
He has a long track of associating with criminals and participating in
criminal acts himself. Since he owns Exxon Mobil and other companies he can
use some of his finite assets to corrupt the political system in the United
States of America and the world.

I never understood why George H.W. Bush went to make war against Panama in
1989, since he is a drug lord himself; he personally revered Manuel Noriega
and he continues to bow to the desires of drug lords and criminals around
the world. Recently, the Bush family wanted to legalize narcotics around the
world. With the support of many individuals, including tycoons Carlos
Salinas de Gortari and Carlos Slim. The latter two share with the Bush
family that besides being drug lords, they also engage in incest and
pedophilia, and administer health damaging substances to their foes. These
individuals also send their foes to be lobotomized. Carlos Salinas the
Gortari recently asked President of Mexico Felipe Calderón Hinojosa to do
him some favors, in return he received 15 billion US dollars and he could
now <beep> with her daughter Cecilia Salinas Occelli. So do not be deceived by
President Felipe Calderon Hinojosa since he is also a drug lord as the
Bushes are. George Herbert Walker Bush and her wife Barbara Pierce Bush also
have close ties with important drug lords, his sons JEB Bush and George W.
Bush obviously, as well. BPB basically does not care about the pedophilia of
her husband or her sons. Continuing with this topic, the Bushes pride
themselves of associating with Carlos Slim and Carlos Salinas de Gortari. As
well as members of the past Bush administration like Dick Cheney, who are
also stunt supporter of narcotics trade. All these individuals have close
ties with powerful criminals of other countries. Another example is past
president of Mexico Zedillo who also was and is a narcotics trader. In
return for the money that they pump into the pockets principally of the
Bushes clan they obtain prestigious academic positions and other favors. I
would also like to focus on another criminal, Rupert Murdoch, since
scientists and physicians participate in the creation of health damaging
substances new companies have to be created to cure or palliate these
diseases. So many individuals are involved in insider trading deals to fill
their pockets, one clear example are all the previously named individuals.

President Barack Obama is also a drug lord, as many of his collaborators
are. When President Barack Obama attempted to destroy the Earth with nuclear
weapons he was basically following the orders of the Bush family. The order
to destroy the Earth came from George H.W. Bush, Barbara Pierce Bush, George
W. Bush, Laura Bush, their daughters Barbara Bush and Jenna Bush, some
tycoons and President Barack Obama. George W. Bush also likes to organize
orgies in which he has sex with her wife and his two daughters. Sadly enough
both Jenna and Barbara are not daughters of George W. Bush, Laura Bush all
the time was cheating on her husband, as a result George W. Bush has two
illegitimate daughters. So do not be deceived by Obama, he is a continuation
of the evil that the Bush family has brought to Earth and acts as a pawn of
the Bushes by following their orders. His health care reform is also very
damaging in its concept and implementation and is also being orchestrated by
the Bushes and the Obama administration. George H.W. Bush has close ties
with the pharmaceutical industry to intoxicate God loving people and others
with strange substances to produce various diseases as already discussed.
George H.W. Bush is also an alcoholic and cocaine addict as are his sons and
Carlos Salinas. His son George W. Bush followed basically the same steps of
his idol, by being a drug lord. In addition to that, the Bushes want to send
God loving people with space shuttles into space and have already done so
with some of their enemies. Continuing with this discussion I would like to
mention that George Herbert Walker Bush administers substances to people to
make them sick. Sadly enough; George H.W. Bush was sufficiently ruthless to
accelerate the death of his own father, Prescott S. Bush by giving him
poisonous substances and making him ill. However, Prescott S. Bush was not a
saint either; one of his worst crimes against humanity was that he
successfully vouched for the liberation of Adolf Hitler from prison in 1924.

George Herbert Walker Bush also has sent many satellites to space. With
satellite technology he can stimulate different areas of the brain and make
people develop diabetes, heart attacks, osteoporosis, cancer, auditory
hallucinations and many other diseases; with this technology he can also
stimulate the phrenic nerve and kill you by developing tachypnea and finally
respiratory arrest. This satellite technology is also very powerful since he
can basically monitor the thoughts of people. As already discussed, last
year the Bushes, President Obama and many others attempted to destroy the
Earth. However, with a simple mathematical conversion you can understand why
nuclear weapons have been rendered futile to destroy the Earth.

m = E / c2

Since people with a sound mind do not want to collaborate with the Bushes
it is of utmost importance to change the regime which is now ruling the
United States of America. Rick Perry has the guts to go against all these
mentioned practices, to build a better America and a better world, so share
this document with your acquaintances worldwide so that they are aware of
the change we need. Thanks in advance for voting for Perry. Other candidates
like Mitt Romney are Mormons and also have been bought out by the Bushes.
The impressive debt of the United States of America was also a by- product
of the Bush’s administration lack of foresight. In addition to all these
points that have been discussed, George W. Bush, President Barack Obama and
his administration were planning to invade Mexico, Canada, Cuba and Central
America, to enter into a long war and an impressive draft. George W. Bush
was planning to ally itself with Putin and his government, in the tradition
of the Führer, to enter into a bilateral non-aggression treaty. In their
naïveté Putin and Bush believe that there would be peace between Russia and
the United States of America.

Finally, I apologize for writing erroneous things about Dr. Bobby R. Alford,
a doctor of the highest integrity.

Sincerely,

Anti-Terror Unit 5

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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby phantazm » Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:20 am

"George Herbert Walker Bush also has sent many satellites to space. With
satellite technology he can stimulate different areas of the brain and make
people develop diabetes, heart attacks, osteoporosis, cancer, auditory
hallucinations and many other diseases; with this technology he can also
stimulate the phrenic nerve and kill you by developing tachypnea and finally
respiratory arrest. This satellite technology is also very powerful since he
can basically monitor the thoughts of people"


I'm probably not the only one to suspect a case of paranoid psychosis; especially a phrase like "he
can basically monitor the thoughts of people"
. The text itself is funny in an absurd way. But if this person really perceives reality like this, it's rather a tragic case. Poor guy...
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Re: "my family has a long history of being intoxicated..."

Postby NotBuyingIt » Tue Mar 20, 2012 3:17 pm

One wonders if "W" himself, during his history of intoxication and with his reputation for gullibility, would believe such nonsense.
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